I was at work on Tuesday and this couple comes up. Immediately the girl lets out a growl and shakes from the cold and from then on was breathing harder through her clenched and off and on chattering teeth. Now, the high for that day was like 74 and at that time in the early evening it was somewhere in the upper 60's and she was about to go into a cryogenic freeze. She wouldn't have been so cold if she would put on some fucking clothes! Seriously, she was wearing a skirt that went just below her underwear... If she was even wearing any... And a shirt small enough for me to use as a sock. As she was walking up she put on a jacket that only went down to a few inches ABOVE her belly button.

This is a whorish trend that has been all the rage this summer and has been dubbed slutwear for obvious reasons. We're devolving as far as clothing goes, back to the old movie versions of what cavewomen looked like, with tiny loincloth's covering their lower halves and strips of cloth to lift and separate their medically enhanced boobs while wearing 4 inch heels, except all the loincloth's and tit-warmers are all pink this year. Yeah, in 2004 pink is the new pink. And apparently so is looking like that one girl back in high school that everyone called "the hep girl."

When did it become fashionable to look like those women in Times Square that would give directions to every car that pulled up? "Hey look, her ride finally arrived, she sure did look cold wearing just a tube top and miniskirt." Twenty minutes later she gets dropped off at the same spot. "I guess it was the wrong car she got in to, but it looks like another car is pulling up. Maybe this will be the right one. Hey, why is she wearing her miniskirt as her top now?"

They're everywhere, these women.  I don't know whether to ask her what her favorite band is or ask her to give me a blowjob. O.o

And the pink wearing jail-bait all want to be just like Paris Hilton now. Apparently their new idol has an IQ lower than her age and more sex tapes out then Jenna Jameson. This is a girl who is famous because she's a rich whore. She's not even an actor, she's not singer though she was in a battle to be the dumbest blonde EVER with Jessica Simpson. By the way, with the THIRD sex tape leaked, I think Paris clinched the award. After the first, maybe the second tape you'd think she would try and backtrack some of those other tapes and hide them. Well, probably burn them because knowing her she'd hide them inside the desk of an Associated Press writer thinking they'd be safe and be completely confused to see them in the front page of every newspaper in the world the next morning. She might as well just go to Vivid and go legit with her porn so she can make money off it rather than 2 minutes of airtime on the 6 o'clock news.

We need to make a new game show called Guess the Hooker. It would be just like To Tell the Truth and you would have to pick which girl is the real hooker by the way they're dressed. Hard game I know, but just look for the girl with the connect the dots going up her arms. It's the only tell. If you just pick the one with the worst cough there's a good chance you'd pick the 16 year old from Hoboken with VD.

But back to the original point I had, why won't these Paris Britney clones get a fucking clue and learn that when it's cold you cover up so as to not be cold? Dress to impress is long dead and replaced dress to ingest... Semen, that is.

I think it's great and all you've grown boobs and you want to share with the rest of the class. It's nice that you wear the oh-so low cut shorts and go a step further of unbuttoning the top button so we all notice that you have the Mary-Kate and Ashley style back when they were starring in Full House. I know what I'm going to do! I'll dress like a clown and then get pissed when people want me to be funny. "Hey fucker, can't I dress how I want to dress without you judging me?" I'll dress in a silver studded jumpsuit and grow sideburns and punch anyone who asks me to sing Jailhouse Rock because I'm just expressing myself through clothing. What the fuck are you expressing, "I'll take it up the ass for twenty bucks?"